Coffee or Fitness

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I love coffee and I love pretending to be fit so I thought this was an ideal logo for me.  I don’t function well in the morning without my first cup of exhilaration.  And I know I should work out in the morning ’cause any other time of day is out of the question for me (just because I’m lazy).   But in my mind I convince myself that drinking a pot of coffee before working out is a really bad idea so working out never seems to materialize but I sure do think about it a lot.

There’s the rapid heartbeat, sweating, panting and loss of conscientiousness just from thinkin’ about the work out.  Ya have a pot of coffee and the adrenaline starts flowing fast, like really fast.  As in, my mind is a blur and my hands are twitchin’.  I better sit down a minute to finish this last cup.  Let’s turn on the workout channel so I can at the very least say I know what some of the moves are.  Then when I’m in a group of fitness guru’s I can join in on the conversation and sound like an expert.

I can talk about how me and my fitness partner Jane…(Fonda; they don’t need to know I watch her on TV) burned off major calories with a new workout that works the upper, lower, middle, sides, butt and brain all at the same time.  I’ll say it in my most bubbly of voices and throw in a couple of “Oh my goshes” just to be convincing.  I’ll walk around in yoga pants and a sports bra and other people will be envious of my obvious dedication to my overall health and well-being.

As I’m waiting in line for a double scoop of mint chocolate chip ice cream,  I can tell the others behind me how I’m treating myself today because it’s a cheat day or because I worked out extra hard (meaning I watched two episodes of Jane’s workout).  I’ll pretend I’m really sore and sound exhausted as I massage my shoulder muscles.  Oh and can I get an iced coffee with that ice cream order.

All this pretending to be fit really is hard work.  I wonder what it would be like to have fitness as a hobby instead of reading?  Coffee is so much easier, just drink, enjoy and you still get the rapid heartbeat.  I wonder how many calories that burns off, hmmm.   Does anyone do coffee AND  fitness at the same time?  That just sounds crazy to me.

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5 thoughts on “Coffee or Fitness

  1. There are supplements out there with coffee in them that are supposed to help burn calories. Maybe there’s ice cream too. I got a giggle out of your graphic before reading your actual post. Then I couldn’t resist reading the post. I knew chuckles weren’t far behind…and I was right. By the way, Jane is great to both watch and listen to on TED. I also like watching her and Lilly Tomlin on Netflix. Shake your head as she speaks on TED [exercise], and a belly laugh watching her on Netflix [also exercise]. Done and dusted!

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  2. So I wonder how your pot of coffee compares to my four shots of espresso in terms of the exhilaration factor. Question: do you grind your own coffee or have it ground for you? Do you drink it strong (spoon stands up by itself) or mild (spoon rests on the side of the cup)?

    As to the exercise, I really believe that it is overrated.

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    1. Oh my 4 shots of espresso! That may be too advanced for me. Maybe someday I’ll make it to that level 😊
      I like it somewhat strong but I add hazelnut creamer to it because I love the smell and taste of it. I tend to agree with ya on the exercise 😊. Merry Christmas Robert

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